A safe and fun first jewish singles date

You've swapped messages, gotten to know each other, and now you're ready to meet face to face. Here are a few things to keep in mind when preparing for a first date:

Where to go. When choosing a place to meet for that exciting first date, it's best to pick a public place. A busy restaurant or coffee shop is a good choice. Another good choice is to plan a daytime date - such as going to a baseball game or playing a round of mini-golf. Here are a few other popular suggestions for a safe and fun first date:

·- A picnic in the park
·- Strolling around a museum
·- A matinee showing of a movie or play
·- An outdoor music festival
·- Attending a sporting event - such as a baseball or football game
·- Coffee date at a popular coffee shop

You might also want to meet someplace other than your favorite spots to hang out - or at least not mention that the meeting spot is someplace you frequent often. That way, you'll maintain control. If this person is eager to see you again, they might come looking for you in the same location if they know it's one of your favorites - whether you want them to, or not.

How to get there. When meeting someone for the first time, be sure you meet them at your designated date location. Never have them pick you up - as you'll then need to reveal your street address or general neighborhood location. If you aren't driving, arrange for a friend to drop you off, or take a cab. But if you take a cab, be sure at least one friend knows the details of where you're going and at what time. Also be sure to carry enough cash to grab a cab ride home after the date if you need to.

What to talk about. Break the ice by paying the other person a genuine compliment, or asking them more about details from their profile. Everyone likes to be flattered, and everyone likes to know that you've taken the time to get to know as much about you as they could. A sincere compliment, and we stress sincere, is a great way to jumpstart a conversation. If that doesn't feel natural, think about what attracted you to them, and take it from there.

Lots of people feel nervous until they've had a chance to warm up and get a read on the situation. If you're feeling tongue-tied, why not ask them their opinion on a current event? Listening to their thoughts on the subject will give you time to get over your initial shyness, as well as stall so you have a chance to pull yourself together and feel comfortable.

Use your instincts to stay safe. Any date you go on should be voluntary — from beginning to end. Even if you're date has rearranged their schedule, paid for everything and gotten a parking ticket just to be with you on your date, you don't owe them anything. And don't let them tell you otherwise. They can yell, they can pout, they can stamp their feet. But if your gut says you're uncomfortable, you don't trust them, you just feel weird but can't put your finger on it, you can excuse yourself, thank them for the evening and walk away. When in doubt, trust your gut and pay attention to any red flags.

Sometimes it's easy to get caught in the moment of being with someone, especially if you're dazzled by certain charms - their looks, their smile, their job, their charisma. But if this person is truly your Mr. or Mrs. Right, you'll have plenty of opportunities to find out in future dates. Be secure enough to know that if this date doesn't work out, there are others just waiting for you around the corner.

If at any point you feel in physical danger, diffuse the situation, involve others around you, call a friend to come get you, get out of there, or even call the police if warranted. Better safe than sorry. No one can blame you for looking out for yourself. And there's no reason to feel embarrassed or worry about what your date will think, or say to you if you "escape" them and an uncomfortable situation. Remember you've known yourself a lot longer than you've known them. Trust yourself, not them. Your safety and comfort level are more important than other's people opinions of you.

Be particularly careful in unfamiliar places. If you're out of your element, be particularly cautious when dating. Whether you're meeting your date in a new part of town, or a different town all together, you want to make sure you set up contingency plans in case something goes wrong. To prepare yourself, always make your own arrangements - even if your date offers you a place to stay or to make hotel or travel reservations for you. Keep it completely in your control by arranging things yourself and keep the relevant information to yourself so that at any point in your date, you have the power to leave without them knowing where you are headed or how to get in touch with you.

If you arrive at the designated date meeting place, and you don't feel comfortable there, either apologize and excuse yourself from the date, or suggest that you go to a different place that you select. Better yet, do your research before you meet your date. If you live in the same city, grab a friend and swing by the intended establishment - both during the day and at night. Remember that the feel of many areas changes once it's dark outside. If you don't like the vibe of the establishment or a neighborhood, reschedule your jewish singles date and propose an alternative destination.

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